Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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