where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
