8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Nicole vs. Life
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
