Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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