I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
