I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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