I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
This is my life. Enjoy the view
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
