Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Did I show you my penis last night?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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