I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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