I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
