and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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