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  • 99 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 5:53pm

    And then I jizzed in my pants.

  • 85 61
    Submitted by greenbumho on Jan 26, 10 at 6:01pm

    holy shit you should write a novel.

  • 77 54
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 1:43am

    In soviet Russia vodka is birth control

  • 86 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 7:06pm

    Had something similar happen to me. Girl knew what she wanted, it's like I was just along for the ride.

  • 76 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 5:22pm

    No it's she just took her BC with liqour, it's gonna be a fuck train. Aalll night long

  • 84 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 4:30pm

    Not first! Yes! I totally didnt beat the people with no lives! So stoked

  • 75 66
    Submitted by Anonoman on Jan 26, 10 at 6:45pm

    That just sounds like an inconvenient time to take it everyday...

  • 70 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 4:48pm

    Lmao funny

  • 73 65
    Submitted by Rubes_Carnies on Jan 26, 10 at 3:56pm

    At least you could Cumm all up in her?

    • 64 75
      Submitted by artisticwingss on Jan 26, 10 at 10:30pm

      what?!

      • 66 79
        Submitted by Herschel on Jan 27, 10 at 12:50am

        He is, quite unnecessarily, pointing out that her usage of birth control means that unprotected sex is far less likely to get her pregnant.

  • 73 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 6:42pm

    hahah hilarious.

  • 66 56
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 11:05pm

    Lol 10:21 you fail

  • 73 74
    Submitted by tokenmetalhead on Jan 26, 10 at 7:15pm

    Time to go?! What are you talking about, she's a keeper!

  • 72 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 9:52am

    I think I've hooked up with chick before....

  • 64 59
    Submitted by JGronroos on Jan 28, 10 at 5:31am

    More like "I knew it was go time."

  • 65 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 28, 10 at 3:31am

    Yup... My kinda woman! Lol

  • 71 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 9:09pm

    $20 says "I knew it was time to go" becomes the new "please come get me"

  • 65 67
    Submitted by Ricochet on Jan 26, 10 at 10:21pm

    oh god i've done this >.< without the sex hah

  • 53 46
    Submitted by whatupbee on Jun 16, 10 at 6:30pm

    In soviet union, you take birth control with vodka

  • 57 56
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 3:43am

    1:42 I bet you got a 408 area code

  • 65 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 6:45pm

    Woohoo get some lol

  • 60 65
    Submitted by JAGboarder2012 on Jan 26, 10 at 4:27pm

    whats wrong with that? haha

  • 49 45
    Submitted by Phantasm on Apr 12, 10 at 6:09am

    It might be the John Legend "I'm ready to go right now" not the TLFN "please come get me". Who knows?

  • 58 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 9:24pm

    9:09 so true

  • 58 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 7:56pm

    Ew. Sounds like a classy woman

  • 58 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 3:53pm

    Haha 3:21 exactly my thought.

  • 63 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 1:42am

    Hellllll ya man! That's a Hella good nite

  • 63 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 3:21pm

    Lock eyes from across the room. FIRST!!!

  • 60 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 6:01pm

    Awesome. Bang her hard

  • 49 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 27, 10 at 9:39am

    RhfsvzzbavgabfndcdooiiiioookooiooooooooioiiiiihuuuuuuyyyyyyyCdfbznzbfhhnws szvsfabggffdfzAaSccccdvgdzmjikppnjknnnnmmmmmlkmbgiuygyhhnjcyuuuoiiugfcvhhbnnnnnnvykahqyjqgsnshskajzgsgsdgdgdggdtshdhsgDfahagasgagatausididkkdkmnhjughmjhhgguhnkjyg

  • 60 85
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 4:56pm

    I think that the joke here is that liquor can f with birth control?

    • 60 69
      Submitted by Herschel on Jan 27, 10 at 12:51am

      I think the joke here is that they were going to have sex with each other.

  • 58 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 3:22pm

    1st

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 26, 10 at 3:21pm

    First! I can see it now...

  • 40 54
    Submitted by eatspanish on Apr 10, 10 at 3:38pm

    Vodkas cute. Lol.

  • 29 50
    Submitted by thegirluwannabe on Jul 28, 11 at 1:27pm

    Excellent move by the female.