Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
the day after is always just damage control
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
