real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
it's not cheating when I paid for it
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
