everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
