love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
