i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
