I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Quick, to the slutcave!
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize