All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize