there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
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She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
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I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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