Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
