I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
