We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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