You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
