I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
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