he shaved USA in his pubs
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Randomize
