But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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