so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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