It was confusing and full of hummus
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize