I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
