im drinking this country out of the recession.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize