if you like me you must not know who I am
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
