Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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