dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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