So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
