For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
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Your in art school, how are you not gonna date a stoner?
whatever inspires you...
Imagine the look of disappointment on his face when he comes over expecting to get laid and he gets six lighters instead.
I'm sure he'd rather get a big bag and you could even skip the decorating.