i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
