WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
