I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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