some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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