Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
i just google imaged poop.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
