Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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