you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
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I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
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Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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