I smell stomach acid.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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