I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
