Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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