We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Found the puke drawer
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
