Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
