I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
