My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
