once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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